re-tooling

haven't played too much lately but when i have played it hasn't been good.

i didn't log a single hand thurs, frid and sat. i was pretty busy with other stuff and by the time i got a minute to sit down and play i was tired and unfocused so i decided not to play.

i got up early yesterday and logged about 800 hands of cash. i made 1/2 buy-in that time but didn't necessarily play well. i went out and did some stuff and came back to log another small session. in about 300 hands i played like total garbage and lost about 3 buy-ins. i was pretty sick, walked away and ran some erans. i came back more focused and made 1-1/2 buy-ins back in another 400 hands. i played ok during this time but still not great. i came back at nite to put one more session in and try to get even for the day. once again i played like crap, tilted like a moron and was a total fish in the game. i lost 3-1/2 more buy-ins to make my total loss for the day in the $470 range.

i was depressed, sick to my stomach and emabarassed about my play. the fact that im getting the crap kicked out of me at 100nl is embarassing to me.

a day later and looking at my play i came to a few conclusions.

1) i tilt way too easily when playing cash games.
2) im playing with ego, not smarts.
3) im playing way too lag for my skill level.
4) im not taking my time to make decisions.

100nl on ftp right now is quite an aggressive game. for some reason im pulling maniac moves that i would never pull in a mtt. its like my inner donk from 3 years ago is coming out. i don't believe anything anyone is telling me with their betting. for instance, a hand from yesterday. mp limps, i raise from the CO w/ 55 to isolate, bad player cold calls on the button and the bb 3-bets pot. the limper folds and i shove because it looked like a squeeze play. bad player folds and bb calls and shows KK. when i pushed the 55 i did it instanly, no thinking, no use of the time bank, no looking up pahud stats. just a knee jerk reaction of "this guy is full of shit, i'll show him".

this is how im playing nowadays and this is why im losing. at first glance yesterday i made the excuse that "im running bad". although i did run poor yesterday, i played even worse. i would estimate that if i a good player had been playing in my spot yesterday, they might have ended down a buy-in. instead i played and am down 5.

so im going to re-tool.

brystmar (guest pro) on cardrunners has a 5-part series out right now about becoming a solid winning tag in the micro to low stakes. im taking tonite to study these vids and get back to the basics. i watched a few of his vids in early may and they were quite eye-opening to me. since then i've slipped into some bad habits that i need to correct.

on the mtt front, im going to stay patient. im getting deep regularly, just not closing the deal. im pretty confident in my mtt game right now even though the results haven't been there.

my br has slipped to about 3.6k which is scary but i have $300+ in rakeback that i can cash in for. ( thank god for rakeback)

here's to turning over a new leaf and getting back on the winning way! (and howard if you're listening, throw me one of those sicko rex55 runs <<<<<<<<< 6 ft's in one week)

tg